I don't know what it is. Maybe because I saw those ads for that TV movie "The Craigslist killer" or because everytime I read the news something that we always think could never happen..happens. Like a plane crashes into an elementary school. Or a bear attacks an unsuspecting woman while gardening. You know..the legit stuff.
Anyway, the point is I think I've been a little on edge lately.
Lately as in...forever.
While in Hawaii we were snorkeling in a bay called "Shark's cove" and I just knew that I was going to have my arm bitten off while looking at coral reef or some clown fish. Apparently they say the name comes from the cove being shaped like the tail of a shark. But was I really going to care about the origins of the name when I only had one arm? I don't think so. I saw Soul Surfer and if we're getting real here I'll just tell you straight up I would not be that cool if a shark bit my arm off.
Last week was when I actually realized my paranoia may have reached an extremely high level of ridiculousness.
I listed a dresser for sale on KSL classifieds. Harmless, right? People sell stuff all the time. No biggie. Until this man called and asked if he could come look at it. So while he's on his way over I casually analyze that he didn't say anything about a wife. Or a woman coming with him. And I'm a woman alone in a house with a small child. Perfect scenario for the ksl killer, right? Right.
"Unsuspecting woman attacked by strange man while trying to sell furniture"
Headlines for some reason are always flashing in my brain like a neon sign that just keeps getting brighter. Ten minutes later I have a plan mapped out for how I will avoid this soon to be traumatic situation. A million questions are going through my brain and I'm sweating because I'm nervous. How can I carry a large knife in my back pocket for protection without it being obvious? Should I have someone on the phone when I answer the door? Is there any point to making dinner? Why the freak do we not have any pepperspray?
Finally..before my already insane mind can get the best of me, the doorbell rings.
And there he was.
The alleged ksl killer was actually a very nice, well-dressed man wearing a BYU football shirt. Turns out he was a bishop with a lovely wife and four kids. And he sold insurance. And while I helped him load the dresser into his truck he and I joked that BYU better win against Utah because it would be really embarrassing if they didn't.
And that my friends is exactly what too much tv will do to you. No more lifetime movies for this girl. Uh uh.
|Not very exciting.|
|This was a glass cookie jar before I spray painted it green.|